Happy 2015, and then not quite so happy, but kind of happy

Happy 2015 everyone! Not written a thing for far too long, in fact 2014 was rubbish for me writing and is something I'll try and rectify. I find I only write about things I have a vested interest in or thoughts on I can't summarize in a tweet - which is few and far between. In fact I've been winging it since my first two posts which were the only reason I bothered with a blog!

Anyway, getting right back into the swing of things I thought I'd do a write up of a couple of films I've seen recently that somewhat resonated with me, for good or bad - and they are by the interesting and to an extent, extreme Director Lars von Trier.
His most recent releases were the controversial Nymphomaniac, which is so long it's split into two parts. It stars well known stars such as Shia LaBeouf, Willem Dafoe, Jamie Bell, Christian Slater and Uma Thurman. As the title suggests, it is largely based on sex, and the story of a woman's life as she battles with what can be a hugely destructive situation. It's made well, and is quite direct with its messages, but it's pretty bleak, slow moving and ultimately downbeat. This should not surprise you as this is part of von Trier's 'Depression Trilogy' with the previous films, Melancholy and Antichrist.
Melancholy I also watched very recently staring Kirsten Dunst who is utterly brilliant,  Keifer Sutherland and Alexander Skarsgard. And true to form whilst the story is totally different to Nymphomaniac they share many of the same themes. If you can handle films that deals with these themes of loneliness, depression, self hate, and bleakness, then I recommend the watch.

It's curious how films resonate with people, and can cause lasting impressions and what people take away from it. Superhero films can be empowering, love films influence happy endings in real life and endless optimism, whilst many of us can look back on a variety of films from our past and associate it with fond memories.
Well this trilogy did the same with me, which I'm not sure was even the intention - Lars, a known sufferer of depression, obviously found these films as a way to express his feelings and perhaps elements of his past (metaphorically I would envisage), which at the same time making films that encapsulate a wider audience and I suppose for them to ultimately, enjoy. We've all seen films that are bleak, violent, scary, or just horrible and found them to be great, it's strange - well in my mind anyway!
Going back to what I was bumbling on about, these films were interesting to an extent, I played Spider Solitaire throughout whilst watching (4 suits, get at me), which would indicate a lack of interest but I find I always do that to keep my mind moving. Which probably makes me mental. But let's save that for another time.
However what I found most interesting was that after of each of the films I was still thinking fairly intensely about them and what they meant to me. I said how things resonate with different people, I think a love film will impact a man in love with a woman, and to encourage them to keep their spark alive (not suggesting it's dying, just you know, reinvigorate it) more so than that same man who would watch it when single. I know it probably seems obvious, but what I'm trying to outline is situations impact us more than we probably realise. Well this is my 'love film' when in a non existent relationship!

I don't like fully laying it all bare, as it's a bit self pitying and attention seeking (in my eyes, it's part of my many failings), yet still surely even a blog post is in the same vein - ah the endless cycle and ends in self doubt! However some of you have read a couple of my other posts so know that depression isn't an alien concept to me, to say the least (I like to think I cope much better now). Well the same can be applied to loneliness (and let's not discount that the two are not mutually exclusive), and these films certainly made me consider that more than usual. I watch alot of films, I love films, I've seen good and bad, happy and sad, optimistic and end of the world films - yet none have triggered these considerations before. Which therefore makes me feel that these films are far more powerful than I thought whilst watching, even as I write this I'm still thinking of them and the themes, which I think is a good sign.

As usual, if you're still reading and stuck with me, then thank you, but you'll notice the chaos of this post and it's lack of actual direction - as I didn't have an agenda, except that I guess it's to say if you get a chance and feel you could handle it, watch these films. Watch more films that might impact you more than you would normally push yourself, find those films that you can relate to, try to do at least 1 that you might flick over in Netflix normally without a second thought, but go back and give it a go. Try and unsettle yourself and see what it does, you could be surprised with the results.

Will try and write something more driven and specific next time!

TV - oh it's tender embrace

I've always had a craving, long term work wise to be doing something that involves writing. It's differed over the years, from journalism to writing a book, to writing a TV show to now thinking it would be quite cool to be a professional TV or Movie critic/analyst/writter/blogger. 

The issue is, and always will be, I'm a lazy sod who doesn't often see things through. I penned some articles, I wrote some stories, I've written out some of my TV script and a film idea, then as always I've just binned it off - put it to the side, and didn't bother following up. This, I fear will end the same way.

But writing about TV would be so good, and pretty apt. I've just had a whole week off work, as holiday - booked to myself as the 1st days off this year. And do you know what I've done, basically nothing. Apart from the basics/flat cleaning and trying to get my ceiling fixed I've essentially indulged in a TV show marathon. Do you know what might make you a bit sick too, it wasn't even 'catching up' - I just went through whole series I hadn't watched at all before, Rectify, Penny Dreadful and Harpers Island were all ticked off the list along with a couple of films (Fuck you 47 Ronin, dreadful)
If I put that into the greater perspective, I could argue that I watch 50 shows per year. That doesn't include those that have finished, as I've already ticked them off (your Sopranos, The Wire, Lost etc) - I absorb TV, I watch shows I know are getting canned, I watch already cancelled old shows, I watch shit that sounds awful, I watch it all. Why? I dunno, I'm a junkie for this shit. And that is predominantly my experience I would whack on this imaginary CV in order to get something like this kicked off the ground.

It's crazy right, as it sounds like a dream job for me, and it would be except a couple of minor points. I watch all these shows and for EVERY episode I watch, I read a full synopsis (usually Wiki) along with a full episode review from Tv.com (my personal fav site), it's fairly heavy going, and the worrying thing is, that I can't seem to see half the in depth stuff those writers pick up! I mean, I catch the main points sure and some subtle variations, I was one of those pricks saying how amazing the light and locations were on True Detective, but that was about it, to get much deeper I'd just be reeling off shit I'd already read. Same with Rectify, a beautiful and glorious show, but the deeper meaning of it all, basically passes me by - I'd need to watch it multiple times to get that and that is what I simply don't have time for. 

Recently Netflix posted a job in the UK where I think around 20 exist globally, but never on these shores. From what I can tell you are essentially the person who works out what the 'what to watch next' should be after a specific show. How amazing is that! You are that GOD who links these things in. Oh so you've watched Penny Dreadful, well may I recommend the madness that is Hemlock Grove, or perhaps the more mainstream True Blood or if you've been living under a rock all these years then fuck it, The Walking Dead is probably worth a shot. What. A. Job.  

Anyway, I've sort of written this out in a moment of hasty possible inspiration over the TV marathon I've indulged myself in, and thought I'd list out some shows I've seen recently (even mid seasons) that I would recommend, all genres and all pretty good! And to let you in on what I could call, in geek terms, as my schedule, and let me be clear I watch all of the below all seasons all the way through. FML.


Penny Dreadful
Harpers Island
Rectify
The Leftovers
Californication
Game of Thrones
True Blood
Hannibal
Orphan Black
Silicon Valley
Fargo
True Detective
Hemlock Grove
Parks and Rec
Workaholics
Archer
Community
Eastbound and Down
Extant
Arrow
Suits
Person of Interest
Modern Family
Under The Dome
Friday Night Dinner
Orange is The New Black
The Bridge
Made in Chelsea ;-)
Arne Dahl
Boardwalk Empire
The League
The Strain
The Walking Dead
Ray Donovan 
The Returned
Phone shop
Bates Motel
The Blacklist
Homeland
The Following
Marvels Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D
Sleepy Hollow
Graceland
Fresh Meat
Man Down
Helix
Uncle
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
Line of Duty
The Americans
Utopia


and breath....

Well I suppose I should start with a Happy New Year. So there, it's done. Good

So have you all made your Resolutions? Have you managed to stick to them so far? Are you considering ditching them already?

I, personally, have not. I don't really see the point in them. Why should I? What difference does a single new day make to me, to choose to do something different/positive?! Why not just do that the day you suddenly decide you want to do it, whether it's March 5th, August 23rd, or whenever. It doesn't matter. In fact the fact you do decide to do it on Jan 1st often could be a case that you're not even doing it for the right reasons. You need to do this for you, not for anyone else, not to tell friends, not to say "my resolution is..."

I've started 2014 with a grumble I know, it's not the aim, it's meant less of that more of a personal feeling about something. I just think you should do something like giving up smoking when you want to do it, don't wait for a reason, don't wait for the convenience of Jan 1st. Do it right now, and do it because you want to do it.

People settle for things too often, too easily, from relationships, to life plans, to goods and services. Why should we, more often than not we deserve more, we're not around forever so enjoy everything whilst you can, or get too old to fully appreciate it. Don't live by the "I wish I did". Just do it, embrace the now.

Look at me, I've shitted on one thing, whilst totally embracing a cliché that sort of means the same thing. It's all part of my meaningless waffle. I suppose that's my resolution, secretly, without admitting it to myself, waffle more, care less, and make this blog look a bit nicer.